The Infirms

2010-08-04

I saw the internal medicine doctor yesterday and he did not give me the antibiotic. To say I was distressed about this would be a giant understatement, because getting that antibiotic is what I've been holding onto for the past several weeks, so I was v. upset last night but have since managed to calm down about it. I have an appointment to see him again on September 7, and between now and then I have to take an over the counter thing every day and then he'll see how I'm doing. In addition, because he was asking what foods were problems for me and I could only name a few, I will be keeping a detailed food journal to try and identify problem foods, and because I need to find some silver lining in this whole thing, I will be looking upon the journal as somewhat of an art project [I bought a few supplies during my lunch hour, including a calligraphy pen]. I know that's maybe a little nuts, but I don't know how else to cope. As I beseechingly told the Universe last night, it has become obvious I am not cut out to deal with a chronic illness at this time, and could the Universe please help me get my health back? I hadn't yet mastered NORMAL life; I am not ready for additional challenges.

Oh, and this morning I asked Francisco to come to the next appointment with me (he doesn't work that night) and even come in the room with me, because if I get upset and start crying like this time, he could maybe help me out by talking to the doctor while I weep. The internal medicine doctor is very kind and seems like he really knows his specialty, but he is also clearly uncomfortable with displays of emotion and didn't know what to do with himself when I got upset. If Francisco is there and not crying (I have to assume), the doctor will have someone non-emotional to focus on, right? So he won't be in such a hurry to flee the interview?

But speaking of poor Francisco, last Friday when he was working, he strained a muscle in his calf, and it's super painful and he can't walk without limping a lot. He went to the hospital after work to make sure it wasn't a muscle tear or a blood clot, and it wasn't; just apparently a strain. Since there's no way he can chase or wrestle perps with the leg the way it is, he won't be working until probably the 19th of this month. He was already going to be off for the week leading up to the 19th, but he'll be off this whole time unless he experiences a miraculous healing. I feel so bad for him; the leg problem is really bumming him out. He loves his job and wants to get back out there.

Despite every little thing, we had quite a good weekend. It was that perfect blend of relaxing and productive and I loved it. One of the best things we did was get our upstairs room whipped into shape. Francisco had ordered two more bookcases for up there (bought two previously, but two wasn't enough), and he had put them together last week but we hadn't moved anything onto them. Sunday afternoon he limped upstairs and stayed (mostly) while I made trips up and down to bring up books from downstairs. We reordered the first two bookcases and added the downstairs books and put up some framed photos and blah blah whatever that room is habitable now. We're going to paint it in early fall, but for now it's done. I want to go through my craft things again and see what I can either get rid of or use immediately, and maybe try to figure out how I ultimately want to organize those things. Also I should start knitting things because my dresser can't hold any more yarn but it seems unlikely I will stop buying good wool from thrift stores. I mean, come on. Who are we kidding.

We ate artichokes from our garden on Sunday night and they were delicious. I called my parents and left a message thanking them for growing artichokes when I was a kid so that I had the opportunity to observe how earwigs hide in the artichokes and crawl out as soon as you put them on your kitchen counter. Because I learned that lesson in childhood, I knew to put the artichokes in a bowl outside, immediately after cutting from the plants, and fill the bowl with water from the hose. Earwig apocalypse! It was a bad day for that species, but I didn't let them ALL drown; I tipped a lot of them out with water while they were still alive. I'm not a monster you know. Other garden foods eaten this weekend: Zucchini, strawberries, cherry tomatoes, beets, green onions (in salad), potatoes. I wish the roma and regular tomatoes would start to ripen, but they don't seem to want to. It would be nice to get some cucumbers too; it's weird to not have any yet. I don't even want to talk about the peppers--they are dead to me. One literally and the rest figuratively.

Love,
E

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cats-kittens

come over some time & see me - 2011-02-25
let's not say goodbye - 2011-02-23
the Rachel Zoe collection - 2011-02-10
I feel happy today - 2011-02-04
the tiny snow stalker - 2011-01-25

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