Laffing time starts now

2004-03-19

A few things of goodness:

First of all, this made me laugh like crazy yesterday--many props to the lovely and talented Atomic for pointing out the funny.

Secondly, I had Dennis pick up Slapshot, which was on the tv last night, and can hardly wait to go home and have dinner and watch it. Those Hanson brothers can really put on the foil, and I love that movie so much it hurts.

Thirdly [and I know I could get in some kind of trouble for posting this, but I'm going to take the chance], this:

From The New Yorker, March 8, 2004:

The Back Page By Steve Martin

STUDIO SCRIPT NOTES ON "THE PASSION"

Dear Mel,

We love, love the script! The ending works great. You'll be getting a call from use to start negotiations for the book rights.

-- Love the Jesus character. So likable. He can't seem to catch a break! We identify with him because of it. One thing: I think we need to clearly state "the rules." Why doesn't he use his superpowers to save himself? Our creative people suggest that you could simply cut away to two spectators:

SPECTATOR ONE

Why doesn't he use his superpowers to save himself?

SPECTATOR TWO

He can only use his powers to help others, never himself

-- Does it matter which garden? Gethsemane is hard to say, and Eden is a much more recognizable garden. Just thinking out loud.

-- Our creative people suggest a clock visual fading in and out in certain scenes, like the Last Supper bit: "Thursday, 7:43 p.m.," or "Good Friday, 5:14 p.m."

-- Love the repetition of "Is it I?" Could be very funny. On the eighth inquiry, could Jesus just give a little look of exasperation into the camera? Breaks frame, but could be a riot.

-- Also, could he change water into wine in Last Supper scene? Would be a great moment, and it's legit. History compression is a movie tradition and could really brighten up the scene. Great trailer moment, too.

-- Love the flaying.

-- Could the rabbis be Hispanic? There's lots of hot Latino actors now, could give us a little zing at the box office. Research says there's some historical justification for it.

-- Possible title change: "Lethal Passion." Kinda works. The more I say it out loud, the more I like it.

-- Is there someplace where Jesus could be using an iBook? You know, now that I say it, it sounds ridiculous. Strike that. But think about it. Maybe we start a shot in Heaven with Jesus thoughtfully closing the top?

-- Love the idea of Monica Bellucci as Mary Magdalene (yow!). Our creative people suggest a name change to Heather. Could skew our audience a little younger.

-- Love Judas. Such a great villain. Our creative people suggest that he's a little complicated. Couldn't he be one thing? Just bad? Gives the movie much more of a motor. Also, thirty pieces of silver is not going to get anyone excited. I think it'd be very simple to make him a "new millionaire." Bring in the cash on a tray. Great dilemma that the audience can identify with.

-- Minor spelling error: on page 18, in the description of the bystanders, there should be a space between the words "Jew" and "boy".

-- Merchandising issue: it seems the Cross image had been done to death and is public domain -- we can't own it. Could the Crucifixion scene involve something else? A Toyota would be wrong, but maybe there's a shape we can copyright, like a wagon wheel?

-- I'm assuming "The dialogue is in Aramaic" is a typo for "American". If not, call me on my cell, or I'm at home all weekend.

By the way, I'm sending a group of staffers on a cruise to the North Pole, coincidentally around the time of your picture's release. Would love to invite your dad!

See you at the movies!

Yours,

Stan

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I love Steve Martin so much right now I can't even tell you.

This Weekend, by Tattoobelly

This weekend I need to do many things. I have some shopping to do, and one thing I need to buy is a dress for my sister's wedding. Fortunately she's being very laid-back about the whole dress thing, so I don't feel a lot of pressure (if any, actually) and am sure I can find something nice and appropriate. Other wedding-related things must be shopped for, as well. I have some cleaning I need to do (stuff I blew off last weekend and now everything is groce) and files to work on at home, and then there are all those books I got from the library. I'll be reading Pink Think, by Lynn Peril, next, and it looks really good--I feel lucky the library had it when I wanted it. I also have some very important sleeping to do this weekend, and will need to amuse Boy more than normal, since Francisco has some dissertation-related stuff he'll be busy with and won't be able to play all those video games with Boy like he usually does. This will be my weekend, and I am really, Really hoping this sore throat I've had today won't develop into anything (there's an illness going around the office), because I have zero time to be sick right now. Do you hear me, Universe? Zero! The End.

Love,

E |

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