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Weasels? Tattoobelly's hitting the sauce again. 2001-07-27 Francisco wrote me a great email this morning, recounting the time he and his friend, Bennett, actually visited the Winchester Mystery Mansion that I spoke of in yesterday's action-packed entry. I emailed him back to ask if I could post his message here, but he must not have checked his email again, because I haven't heard back. If he gives permission I will absolutely be posting his message here, because it's a great story and I think it would amuse all y'all. I really love using that "all y'all" thing--can you tell? What a good day this is! It's a Friday, obviously, which means that I have days off to look forward to (I'm taking Monday off, so three day weekend for me--huzzah!), but I also slept fairly well and had enough coffee to get me going, and nothing heinous has happened so far today. It doesn't take much to make it a good day for me. There are two cardinals sitting on a branch outside my window, and they seem to be looking at me accusingly. This would be because last week some guys came to power-wash the outside of our building, so I took the bird feeder off my window. I tried to put it back up but it kept falling off, so I gave up in frustration. I think I'm going to need to put that up again, no matter how many tries it takes me, because I can't take the guilt these cardinals are throwing my way. Plus I really like looking at the birds at my feeder; they're beautiful. Soupstain wrote me an email today regarding the loogy thing from yesterday and he is so funny. He used the phrase, "it'll all end in tears", and I love that phrase. Other phrases I enjoy are "dog and pony show", as in, "Who's running this dog and pony show?" and "got me by the short hairs". That last one is pretty hard to work into conversation, and impossible to work into polite conversation, so it is a little-used gem. Here is a fact which is a fact because I say it is, not because anyone with the proper authority has validated it. But I think you'll agree with me about its essential factuality: Weight loss is the new alchemy. Forget turning lead into gold; nowadays people want to turn fat into muscle, or really anything that isn't fat. I think some people would turn fat into weasels if it were possible. Why weasels? I don't know--the word was pleasing to me at the time, i.e. 10 seconds ago. Anyway, look at the national obsession with losing weight--you can't turn on the television anymore without seeing ads for magical pills or juices that will just Sluice that fat away in a weekend. And the infomercials just keep coming. This morning I caught a couple minutes of an infomercial for a device you strap around your waist and which electrically-shocks your stomach muscles to contract them. This is supposed to give you a six-pack and take inches off your waist. Please. And almost any magazine you buy will have an article about weight loss: "How to lose that last ten pounds!" "East anything you want and still lose weight!" "Kathie Lee's Miracle Diet!" And people will try pill after gadget after diet in the endless quest to not only lose weight, but to lose it without actually changing anything they do. I'm sorry to be the bearer of bad tidings, but it just isn't possible. You must eat well and you must exercise, and it won't be easy and it won't be immediate, but it can be done. And I think I will take my own advice. I haven't been buying the gadgets or pills or juices, but neither have I been really working at it, so here goes. But can I just say one last thing along the same lines? I have newfound respect for people who manage to kick drug and alcohol addictions, because lately I am finding it incredibly hard to stop eating sugar, and you have to figure drugs and alcohol are more addicting. You pit a syringe full of heroin against a decadent chocolate-frosted brownie and the heroin is going to be technically more addictive, but dude. I Really Want that brownie. Francisco's naked 5K is tomorrow. It is supposed to rain off and on this weekend so I guess it's possible the race could be cancelled, but I kind of doubt it will be, unless the rain is torrential and there is lightning. It would seem that people who don't mind running naked are not going to mind getting wet, because the temperature is supposed to be in the low 80's, so it's not like there will be a danger of hypothermia. I am still thinking I will spectate at this race in my altogether, but I reserve the right to chicken out at the last minute. Either way I will have a full report for you on Monday morning. Must go now. Think good thoughts for Francisco tomorrow morning, and for me, because if I'm naked in a crowd of naked strangers, I'm going to need all the support I can get. No pun intended. Love!
come over some time & see me - 2011-02-25 |
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