power to the people
I think I need to start doing a Junior High Slang update, as a regular thing, since it changes so frequently and is so ridiculous in the first place. The thing Jr. High kids used to say to each other, to initiate either a real or a mock fight? "Squad Up". This has now changed to "Man Up", and I miss Squad Up already, but am looking forward to challenging my boss to Man Up as soon as possible.
But speaking of that assy man, I forgot to report that Friday afternoon he called me into his office to watch a "really funny video" one of his friends had emailed him. It was a country music song with the refrain, "it's hard to kiss the lips at night that chew your ass out all day long", and the video was horrendous. It featured two "couples" (the woman in each couple was an ugly man in drag) where the wife is a complete raging bitch and the man is a long-suffering individual putting up with the wife's behavior. Oh, and my favorite [this is sarcasm] part was where the singer bemoans how his wife has gotten fat and he's not attracted to her anymore. Yeah, so this travesty finishes and the boss asks me what I thought.
Me: *blank stare* Well, I guess it was one of the funnier unbelievably misogynistic things I've seen.
If someone asks you if you want to see a really funny Vince Gill video he/she just got via email, invent some reason you're too busy to watch it, because that thing is a piece of shit.
Okay, but this is totally awesome. I salute this genius artist and exhort the Universe to magically make me start thinking of stuff as good as that.
When Francisco and I got married, we were given lots and lots of wonderful gifts, and among them were 3 gifts that didn't have identifying information on them. Possibly there were originally cards attached that got separated from the gifts, but we got a lot of cards and there was no way to tell which cards Might have gone with the gifts. One person identified her gift when we had her over to dinner--we served salad in the bowls she gave us--and I was so happy to be able to actually thank her for the bowls, because those unidentified gifts were really weighing on me. The other two unidentified gifts remain a mystery, and we had actually taken both of them back because one was a set of cookware we knew we wouldn't use and the other was a BRAUN HAND BLENDER, and see, this is the whole reason I went into the wedding gift thing in the first place, because what I want to say is, why the hell did we return the Braun hand blender??? I think we just didn't know how great it was (we were young and stupid), because this new hand blender Francisco's sister gave him is Fantastic! It pureed that soup last night like a champ, and I am trying to resist lamenting all these hand blender-less years, because it's not like I can get them back, so the lamenting is pointless, but at least I can tell alla y'all: if you receive a hand blender as a gift, do not under any circumstances return it for a different gift, because you will be sorry someday. Even if you don't make soups which require pureeing, you can at least make milkshakes or sauces or some damn thing in which the hand blender will be useful.
That's all the time I've got today.
Power to the people!*
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