I'm not a prude but I play one on tv


Here's the thing, and if you're a regular visitor I hope you already know this, but I am not a prude. For real. I don't have any problems with sex or talking about sex, or other people talking about sex. I'm also (and I hope you'll agree) pretty good at taking a joke. But for some reason, when I came back from walking with Francisco during my lunch hour and found a condom tucked under the radio on my desk, I was not amused. I think the implication is supposed to be that Joyce left it laying around, because she's a big whore, but I'm not laughing. I think this is partly because I don't know who left it there as a joke [and if it's my boss then that's just plain fucking GROCE], and partly because it's unimaginative and therefore irritating. Probably whoever left it there is expecting me to come barreling out of my office after finding it and make a big deal about it, but I am not only not barreling out of my office, I'm going to pretend it wasn't in here in the first place. I think I'll shut my door and keep it shut, mainly because my boss is on my last gay nerve, but also now because of the nonfunny joke condom. If anyone asks me if I've found anything else for Joyce, I'll just say no. Besides, Joyce called in sick today, so she Couldn't have left it laying around. Her Legionnaires Disease was flaring up.

Holy wow, this afternoon I was given a bigger monitor (19 inch) and it's just crazy big. I feel like I'm at a drive-in movie. Ooh, I hope they're showing Porky's Revenge--I'll need some popcorn and raisinets, stat!

My mom sent me an email last night recalling all the times she and I would start giggling in church and be unable to stop. This happened almost always when people were singing (we had a couple of bad singers at our church, except they didn't know they were bad), or also when this one guy was playing his harmonica, dramatically and with great emotion. One of us would start and that would set the other one off, and pretty soon we'd be doubled over, trying not to make any noise while at the same time being consumed with hysterics and on the verge of hyperventilating. Oh man, those were some Good Times.

This morning I dreamt I was pregnant with triplets. They were naturally conceived--not fertility drug triplets--and I don't remember much about that dream except the feeling of surprise. I hope I don't start having pregnancy dreams every night now--2 nights in a row is enough. It's not really Bothering me, but it makes me wonder Why I'm dreaming I'm pregnant. Probably I just want some fried chicken or something. Mmm, fried chicken.

Francisco and I got up at 5:30 today but again did not go to the gym in favor of watching House. It was good, as always. Tomorrow morning we'll go to the gym, and that'll be nice because Friday mornings are always the least crowded days. Tonight when I go home I've got some knitting to finish, a couple of cds to burn, and packing stuff to mail. We'll also watch last night's Lost and eat falafel for dinner. HOOBOY, I love me some falafel.

The giantness of this monitor is amazing. As soon as I've posted this entry, I'm going to make wallpaper that says:

(800) 929-4843

Btw, I chose 929-4843 because that corresponds with WAY-HUGE. Which this monitor definitely is.

E |


come over some time & see me - 2011-02-25
let's not say goodbye - 2011-02-23
the Rachel Zoe collection - 2011-02-10
I feel happy today - 2011-02-04
the tiny snow stalker - 2011-01-25

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