Happy vs Less Happy


Things that are making me happy lately:

1) Exercise. A couplethree weeks ago I decided it was high time I started exercising regularly again, so I've been using the treadmill every morning and I feel very good about it. I have a whole plan that I won't bore you with, for getting into good cardiovascular shape, and I'm excited to keep implementing it. Also, I don't know for sure, but it's possible the exercise is helping with my intestinal thing, because it's been less bad this month than it was last month, with all other factors remaining basically the same. So that's also a reason to continue, but I would have continued anyway.

2) Riding my bike. I ride my bike to and from work, but I've also been riding it around for errands and stuff, and I love it because it makes me feel self-sufficient in a way driving never does. I'll be sad when it's too cold to ride, which will for me be when the ground gets frosty. I'm too afraid of slipping on ice/frost and crashing to ride my bike in those conditions, so at that point the old girl will go into the shed for winter. I will miss her.

3) Xanax! Let me explain. Last year when I had my annual exam, I told Doctor I was having occasional anxiety at night that was hindering my sleep and I asked him if I could try out some Xanax. He said okay and gave me a prescription for 10 pills. The first time I wanted to take it, I cut a pill in half and took just half, to see if that would be enough, and it was. I took the rest as halves, except for a couple times I was so keyed up about something I took two halves, but when I was finished with the prescription, I felt like I didn't really need to pursue getting more. I had sort of figured out some ways to deal with the night anxiety without pills, so didn't feel I needed them. But over the past few months, this whole deal with my intestines has reactivated my doctor anxiety (I used to call it a doctor phobia, but I think that was overstating it), to the point that when I'm going to see a doctor (Internal Medicine guy, for instance), I get so nervous my mind goes kind of blank and I also get upset easily. I have an appointment with Internal Med guy early next month, and I've been dreading it, but then I decided to see if I could get more Xanax, just so I'd have it for that appointment. I called the pharmacy yesterday morning (automated refill system) and put in my prescription number. The robot voice told me I had no refills (which I knew), but then, as I knew it would, gave me the option to have them contact my doctor to request a refill. YES PLEASE--I sure as shit don't want to contact my doctor, especially because he's probably not there and I'd have to deal with his fill-in. Anyway, blah blah blah my refill was okayed! I haven't picked it up yet but I'm SO GLAD I'll have some chemical calmness to help me through talking to Internal Med guy. I think doctors take women less seriously when they cry, and I really need to be taken seriously, because I am DONE messing around and I want that goddamn antibiotic. I may have said that before my last appointment with him, but it continues to be true.

4) A couple nights ago we started talking about taking a vacation this winter and kicking around where we might want to go. We'd go in January, and the #1 criteria would be someplace warm. Francisco says that he'd really like to swim while we're on vacation, and I love swimming, so I agree. The Carribean is on the table, but we're also talking about New Zealand again. It'll be summer there, so surely there will be swimming opportunities. I'll keep you posted.

5) My supervisor expressed an interest in having birds in the plants in the outer office (like I have in my office plants), so I brought in the rest of the cardinals I got at the thrift store and decorated. I also put a bird in one of the big boss's plants, on the sly, to see how soon she'll notice it. Prediction: It'll be at least one month. Anyway, I'm pleased for my birds to be taking over the office, because I'm a megalomaniac. Fun fact about Eva!

Things that are making me less happy lately:

1) I have a problem with my right eyeball that's requiring I wear my glasses, and they're not comfortable and I'm tired of them. I saw my eye doctor last Friday and she prescribed antibiotic/steroid combo drops that I've been using and the eye is getting better. I saw her Monday and will see her again on Friday, and assuming the eye is well on Friday, I can start wearing my lenses again. Excitement! The eye problem is something called Infiltrates, which I googled but got bored reading about before I really understood it. I like the name Infiltrates because it sounds stealthy and ninja-like. It's something to do with white blood cells and them collecting in one spot on the cornea and zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz I like bacon.

Side Note: After my Friday appointment I will have paid my eye doctor (in co-pays) $90 for this eye problem, and I spent $20 for the eye drops. At this point I am super curious to know what my 2010 uninsured medical expenditures have been up to this point and may need to dig out bills and do the math. Francisco has been getting the bills from the mailbox and paying them quickly so I won't see them and worry about how much of our money has been going toward useless medical appointments and tests, but I just kind of want to know. Too bad I didn't establish a pre-tax medical spending account for this year. If I was psychic I totally would have, and right now I would be telling you about how awesome being psychic is instead of kvetching about how much I'm paying for stupid body-related things. I would also be winning the lottery, over and over again.

2) Work. Dear Work: Be less annoying. I'm still grateful to be working with BroCo, though, especially since I can leave work-related notes for him and sign them, "Your friend in Christ, Eva". He's not religious either, so it's funny, see. No offense intended toward people who are friends in Christ or with Christ. It's just not my thing.

As you can see, Things Making Me Happy totally beats Things Making Me Less Happy, so I consider this a win for the good guys*.


* Look, I don't know. Don't question me.



come over some time & see me - 2011-02-25
let's not say goodbye - 2011-02-23
the Rachel Zoe collection - 2011-02-10
I feel happy today - 2011-02-04
the tiny snow stalker - 2011-01-25

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