biting the halo off a hollow chocolate Baby Jesus


I'm not going to pull any punches about this, people: my hair looks freaking amazing. I bought a spray gel when I got my hair cut yesterday, and I like it. The spray aspect not so much (it mists and gets on parts of me that aren't my hair) but the results, oh my yes. I needed to use the bathroom a few minutes ago, and when I was washing my hands I saw my hair in the mirror and could not get over it. To top it off I bought new mascara last night (previous one had achieved clump factor) and it is adding to my overall radiance today. The only fly in the ointment for me, appearance-wise, is that I smell like hot pan. Last night we bought a large cast iron skillet and Francisco decided to season it (cover in oil and bake in the oven) this morning. The smell permeated the house and my clothes, and probably my eyebrows. I'm glad we have the skillet, because he's going to make fried chicken in it (!), but the smell I could do without.

This morning in the shower I had one of my trademark brilliant ideas that will never come to fruition because no one will pay for it. I was thinking about ferrets and how I like them but would never have one as a pet (too high maintenence for me), and I was thinking it's a shame my cats will never get to see or smell a ferret, because I'd like to see what they'd do. And then I was thinking how there are really so few things they'll get to see and smell, and then I was thinking how cool it would be to have a business where I made house calls with a whole bunch of interesting things for cats. It would be like cat edutainment. I could have different animals for cats to see and smell (not kill and eat) and anything that I thought cats would find interesting but would never have the chance to see in a natural habitat. I could finish up by a long bout of playing with the cats with interesting toys, and then serve them caviar and fois gras (tiny little portions). Clearly this idea is fabulous (I mean, Clearly) but will never see the light of day, because no one is going to pay me to do this. I could do it for free, but why?

Francisco made coffee today and about a third of it went on the floor. This is because he set it up to run and pushed the button and didn't put the carafe in it. He had the carafe sitting in the sink, full of hot water. He's fussy like that; he likes to warm the carafe before the coffee goes into it. So I'm bustling around getting ready and he's bustling around and then he notices how the coffee is pouring from the machine onto the counter and from there to the floor, the silly ass. I'm not thinking he'll do that again any time soon, but I'd be willing to bet money it'll happen again. These things never occur only once.

I did the rest of the cheesy step aerobics tape this morning and again could not keep my eyes off the parrot in the background. He continued to disdain the aerobicizers and I also think, toward the end of the tape, that he was plotting his escape. Poor bird; living his life as a backdrop. I wish I could liberate him.

Our office is having walk-in hours again today, 9-12 and 1-4. There were already people here when I rolled in at 8:20 and apparently some people came to the office at 7:30. I just want to tell these people, "It's not a garage sale--you can't show up early!" The whole reason we give ourselves a couple hours of the day free of walk-ins is so we can get some freaking work done. I am aggravated.

My boss brought in an enormous basket of chocolate things this morning, and apparently he's been eating them. This is only remarkable because he made a big deal of giving up chocolate for Lent, as he has done every single year that I've worked here. I'd like to tell him that he should maybe try a bigger sacrifice next year, because he's done chocolate to death, but it's none of my business. And since he's been eating the chocolates, he's not actually giving them up for Lent, right?

Dear Bossman,

You're letting the Baby Jesus down! He's probably drinking gin straight from the cat dish, all because of you and your chocolates.



This is all I have right now, and since I will probably be too busy to write any more later today, have a good weekend!


E |


come over some time & see me - 2011-02-25
let's not say goodbye - 2011-02-23
the Rachel Zoe collection - 2011-02-10
I feel happy today - 2011-02-04
the tiny snow stalker - 2011-01-25

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